Poetry: There's a Mass Up My Ass, Part IV

Too tired to describe the first day of treatment, so here's Part IV of "There's a Mass Up My Ass":

Part Four: The PET Scan

We’re here to check in

With this PET scan aborning

What’s that you say

No coffee this morning?

So now I must wait

Another hour I must stay

While my wife’s in the lobby

With 50 Shades of Gray

Now sit in this room

Your scan is up next

And try not to move

You can read but don’t text!

We’ll inject you with this

And to be proactive

Don’t hug your kids

You’re radioactive!

Then on into the tube!

With Versed – not a drop!

For this one-time PET Scan

At 4000 a pop

One more thing, Doc

One question please

Why did you scan

From my head to my knees?

Cancerous cells

Like to have friends

For all that we know

It could be in both ends

This scan will show

Once the data is read

Where the cancer has gone

And how much it has spread

A mass in my ass!

A tumorous humerus?

A lump in my pump?

Locations numerous!

All of the places

That cancer could go

And some of them worse

Than the one that we know!

Now don’t be concerned

No need yet for sorrow

You’ll get the results

At the surgeon’s tomorrow